What each of my book’s characters would give you for Christmas
(Assuming you're a friend of theirs)
What would each of the main characters in The Pyromancer’s Scroll give you for Christmas?
Durrin:
Durrin gives you his autograph, signed in flame just hot enough to blacken a line on the parchment—but not so hot it catches the parchment on fire. The autograph is scorched in front of you live, and then handed to you with a cocky grin and a “You’re welcome.”
Adara:
She can't decide what to get you, wastes a bunch of time thinking about it, and then finally has Lady Luviana pick for her.
Lady Luviana
Lady Luviana gets you a bottle of her favorite brand of moisturizing lotion.
Skagar
Skagar pays you a personal visit on Christmas Eve at 7:30 in the morning, talks your ear off for three hours, then runs off after realizing he’s about to be late to the Annual Sumian Academy Christmas Eve Brunch.
He stops by later in the afternoon because he forgot to give you your gift: a nice ballpoint pen. (He stays another two hours chatting on your doorstep before finally leaving.)
Volthorn:
Volthorn is too busy running a war to stop by, but he sends his brother Trazar on his behalf. Trazar delivers a small arm shield with a terramancy crystal, with a note where Volthorn says he’ll show you how to use it if you ever feel like dropping by the training grounds.
Salidar Aram:
Pulls some strings with your company to get you promoted at work, with a hint he expects a favor or two in return soon.
Then he invites you to an extravagant dinner at his palace, filled with the who’s-who of Imperium’s high society.
In a toast at the end of dinner, he calls you out specifically by name, praising your loyalty to Calamar and thanking you for a generous parcel of land you have pledged to donate to the Aram estate to support the war effort. (You never made such a pledge.)
Cymer:
Invites you with him to go take baskets of food to the poor, during which you have a deep heart-to-heart talk.
He then gives you the most expensive gift on your (private) wish-list—but it is broken beyond repair.
He then shares some profound words about the need to look beyond material things for happiness.
Twigly:
You come home the evening of December 25th to find your house cleaned out except for a lone Christmas tree and a note.
The note says, “Consider this revenge for the potato incident. P.S. Since it’s Christmas, I left you the tree.”
Credit for this post goes to (1) the random Instagram account I ran across who did a similar post last year, and (2) my siblings, especially my brother Tyler, who responded to my prompt in our family chat with glorious ideas.
P.S. This isn’t Twigly’s first Christmas-related robbery. Have you read my 2023 Christmas story?
Twigly and the Great Yuletide Heist
Twigly was about to pull off the greatest heist in the history of aerial buccaneering: snatching a sleighful of gifts out from under the nose of the Spirit of Yuletide herself!
Was it a black ballpoint pen? Or blue? Or maybe it was one of those amazing clicking pens that can do 4 alternating colors: black, blue, red, and green! I would love that!